It's been 283 longest days of my life, and it's keep GOING.

It's been 283 days,

there r 86,400 seconds in a day, 1,440 minutes, 24 hours, so it means

I've lost you for
24,451200 of seconds,
407,520 of minutes,
6,792 of hours.

But none of that can values how hurt i am.
Seeing u go, seeing u leaving me without a word and i couldn't do anything about it at all.
It's been so long. But i cant even stop from thinking of u. My love for u just grew stronger each day.

It's been so long. But i cant even stop from thinking of u. My love for u just grew stronger each day.

It's painful, it's hurting me a lot.
They say move on,
They say forgets u,
They say find another girl, They say God has better plans for me with someone better.


Well, they just didnt get the point, that u were my best girl,
And i dont expect more or less, better or not,
i JUST need YOU and u is enough for me, cuz ur my always perfect one.


It's not that i dont want to accept the fact that ur gone. It's not about that,
Im just accepting the fact that, I CAN'T stop from loving u. I tried hard, i prayed hard.
Some may say God doesnt listen to my prayers, but I say, He has reasons in everything.


I can see that ur having a good life there, I can see those honest smiles with no heart-feelings problem anymore. I guessed, u managed to get the life u wanted most, free from the tense of having me as ur biggest problem, reaching ur biggest dream to have ur degree with ur friends. :D i smiled, cried in the same time cuz i noe, for u to have all that precious life and smiles back, it is best for me not to interfere and knock back and ur door-heart, YEs, it's so painful n hurtful, but if its all a no man like me could do. I'd let it flows away.



I'm just jealous that i couldnt be the one who made u happy now. Now i am the one whos making fake smiles just so people could stop asking what's wrong with me. :') and Yes i lost with ur Mount Everest Ego. xD.


A friend of mine said, I loved too hard that wen I fall, i fall too hard that i broke into pieces that no one can glue me back. Well, she's totally right about that.


These, these things im goin thru now, is the results of me of not appreciating u before. It's like a monkey with a flowers. The flower's so pretty but all the monkey sees is a stuff with no values at all. And YES the monkey, eheem.. me i mean, was wrong. And now he got nothing.


All he have now is a sole PATIENCE, waiting that perhaps, someday in the future, u might realize who i am to u again. I noe, we all noe, the numbers r still going, every seconds, is a pain in the ass for me, but what can i do ? except wait and hopes God hears my prayers, and send u back to me. Im sory i dissapoint u before. Im sorry i was such a jerk, no words could describe how stupid i am,  but this stupid man called me.


LOVES you till the end of you life. :') STILL and always do. They say loving alone seem stupid. IDGAF.

I love you, thats wat matter MOST.